Category: Joke of the Day

Joke of the Day – 2.18.16

A priest is giving a sermon at a children’s mass.  He asked the kids, “What do you think would happen if the next time your parents asked you to do something, and you did it right away?” A number of the students raised their hands.  One of them said “They’d be happy.”  Another one said […]

Joke of the Day – 2.17.16

A man calls a lawyer’s office, “Smith, Smith and Smith, may I help you?” “I’d like to speak to Mr. Smith.” “He’s in court this morning.” “Ok then, let me speak to Mr. Smith.” “He’s attending a legal seminar.” “Then get me Mr. Smith!” “Speaking.” -Henny Youngman   0

Joke of the Day – 2.16.16

One morning, an absent minded man kisses his wife goodbye as he’s leaving to go to work.  The wife says to him, “Drive carefully honey, its rush hour.”  “Don’t worry, I will,” he says.  The wife sits down at the breakfast table and turns on the local morning news show.  There’s a report about someone […]

Joke of the Day – 2.15.16

A man walks into a doctor’s office.  The doctor tells him, “Step into this room, take off all your clothes and stick your tongue out the window.  I’ll be back in a few minutes.”  The patient follows the doctor’s orders, and the doctor returns five minutes later.  The doctor says, “Ok, you can put your […]

Joke of the Day – 2.14.16

On Valentine’s day morning a woman wakes up with a start and says to her husband, “Honey, I had the strangest dream.  I dreamt that you gave me a pearl necklace.  What do you think it means?”  He replied with a smile, “You’ll find out tonight!” That evening at dinner, the husband hands her a […]

Joke of the Day – 2.10.16

Today is Ash Wednesday, the start of Lent.  Symbolized by the imprint of ashes on our forehead, to remind us that from dust we came, and to dust we will return. Somebody at the office: “I saw on the news, a place where people can get ashes in a drive-thru!” Me:  “Well I guess the […]